The past several days I am battling some serious physical exhaustion. It comes with the territory. I have Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. I know, it is part of my new territory. I don’t think that fully takes away the pain that I face, but it may make it a bit easier knowing 1) I am not alone 2) It’s just where I am. Today, it’s hard. To be fully honest, it’s not easy and I am not okay. It’s hard! I have spent the last several days in bed. Just getting up when I have to for doctor’s appointments, to eat, etc.
One of the most frustrating things is to go to the doctor, to be put through test after test, and they find no source for why I am so exhausted. Maybe, this time will be different. Maybe, it will be declared again just Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. There’s a powerful episode of Golden Girls that helps me remember I am not alone. Though based on real life, many face this. “Am I crazy?” “Am I dying?” “What is wrong with me?” Crazy to think how little progression has been made to finding quicker answers towards CFS (and other things) in the past 30 years since that clip first hit the air. For the full two-part episodes, see Golden Girl‘s “Sick and Tired” which is found in the beginning of season 5.
I attempted to exercise tonight. I was doing 5k’s not too long ago. I stopped maybe a month ago, due to the exhaustion coming back. I am still trying to exercise a little bit each day. But on days like today, it was a hard struggle. There was some screaming of lyrics, outloud praying (I normally pray silently. It is just how I normally pray.), and then some uplifting by certain lyrics (Good Day by Britt Nicole; Sometimes by Skillet). God got me through it. He will give me the strength I need. He remains my hope. He is sovereign! There is no one like my God!
God remains my Hope..and Strength..He gives me the words to sing and to praise Him. He equips me, even if I don’t realize it!
2 Chronicles 14 offers the same prayer of hope that I can pray wherever I am, whatever I am facing: “Then Asa called to the LORD his God and said, “LORD, there is no one like you to help the powerless against the mighty. Help us, LORD our God, for we rely on you, and in your name we have come against this vast army. LORD, you are our God; do not let mere mortals prevail against you” (14:11).
Thankfully I made my “dinner” (or post workout smoothie) before I began my little exercise. Exercise generally depletes me, and it does so regularly. It takes what little energy I have, but exercising is something that I love to do. Exercise is also important in helping my body. It just takes a lot out of me. So, I had a smoothie today. I tried out a new recipe using quick gluten free oats, flaxseed meal, sunbutter, chocolate protein powder, spinach, rice milk, water, and vanilla extract. Xanthan gum even made an appearance in tonight’s smoothie. This recipe called for xanthan gum, and it made the really enjoyable. The xanthan gum thickened the smoothie. What a great way to make an easy meal, and it was healthy. Here is the recipe for tonight’s smoothie by Happy Being Healthy. I adapted the recipe to meet my own needs and tastes.